The spiritual path is a transformative journey of self-discovery, inner awakening, and connection with the universe, transcending religious and cultural boundaries. The spiritual path involves introspection, meditation, and mindfulness practices, leading to clarity and insight into one's true self and purpose in life. Seekers on the spiritual path yearn for enlightenment and interconnectedness with all life, fostering compassion and empathy for others. Spiritual growth requires courage to confront inner obstacles and challenges, leading to personal transformation and evolution.

The Mystery of life

 The Mystery of Life 

There was a big moment when I was about six years old. It was just after Christmas. Our family had just moved to town, and my parents were trying to make friends at every available opportunity. One of them even went so far as to bring me all the presents that he could find in two weeks. You see, we lived somewhere close by, but it was mostly empty, so there were no houses to have dinner with. In this area, you just had to get groceries from whatever store happened to be in that building in each neighborhood. So, of course, the first thing my dad did was start shopping for some books for his kids. He searched around until he found “The Catcher in the Rye” by JK Rowling and the other author, JG Ballard. At least, it’s what they say.

My mom wanted to buy “The Hunger Games” or one of her favorite series, but my father said that those movies were too violent. Instead, she bought him a classic novel. This was also a time before the internet and smartphones when it wasn’t easy to keep up with everybody else who had something new up their sleeves.

I can’t remember much about these days, but I do know a few things about how I grew up. Because like many young people of my generation, I moved away from home more often than a lot of kids. When I did go back home, there had been always an air of mystery. Why would somebody move away from the place that they love? Wasn’t moving to a new city meant the end of your parents? Or maybe not! Maybe they were afraid to leave them alone again, only way more lonely, right?

As I grew older, I realized that the questions about why moved away homes often arose because of divorce or separation. But there are many reasons for someone leaving and never returning home again. And I started realizing that I was going through it. We moved all over the world, got married, and had our children, but somehow this whole transition had been almost seamless. I didn’t feel any different as the months passed and there was certainly no change. Except the fact that I felt less than stable, or like something bad was happening at home.

There’s nothing wrong with feeling that type of insecurity. Many times in life, you don’t fully understand what’s going on and might not even realize how strange things may be going on. That’s normal and it makes sense. It’s just human nature to wonder if something will ever happen again and try to prepare yourself for it. After all, if you do that, then there’s no point putting extra effort into it. Just accept it when it happens all of a sudden. If everything goes well, why worry so much? All you need to do is ride out those hard feelings and focus on living another day. Besides being healthy to deal with those problems, it does help you become strong, ready to face anything that comes your way. The kind of resilience that leads to a better quality of life. Not that I felt any differently, but simply thinking about it made me feel good. Life is not perfect, even though it seems like it is. Nobody has to be.

So, during the summer vacation, I read the Harry Potter series again. For the first time in years, I sat down in front of my laptop and felt like reading something good instead of scrolling through social media for hours. I decided to take what I learned from “Harry Potter” and apply it to real-life situations. Now, what I did was create a challenge. To write 100 words about my experience of being bullied and excluded at school. Since we live in a small community, it was difficult for us to get together with everyone. It took quite a long time, but eventually, I managed to get my classmates, teachers, and neighbors together. Once we got together, I wrote a brief story about what it was like being rejected. My goal was to write 1000 words on the subject. Some of my colleagues told me that I didn’t want to publish the article, but I kept on writing and finally finished it as planned. To be honest, I couldn’t even believe it myself, but as soon as I posted it online, people started sending positive comments and clapping for it. They even wished me luck because it must have been awful writing this piece. Honestly, I was relieved.

After that incident, the world changed. Even though I was still a kid, I knew that bullying and discrimination were part of everyday life. I started to see it all around me. People were getting hurt all the time. A large majority of those issues that took place were not personal but were related to external factors. Things like social pressure, negative peer groups, etc. When I saw people around me getting hurt, I thought about what would have happened to me if that had happened to me. Would I be able to handle myself? Would I be able to speak up about this situation? Those questions consumed my mind and my heart. Eventually, I thought about quitting secondary school, although I hadn’t given it much thought. Luckily, all my peers encouraged me to stay going and supported me throughout the process. Despite the tough stages of my past, I was determined not to give up even till now.

Fast forward to 2021. Everyone around me was battling the coronavirus. By the spring, it became clear that the pandemic was coming to an end. Everybody was optimistic that things would return to normal life. Well, there had not been enough progress in terms of vaccinations and the ability of society to accept the virus. Suddenly Covid struck again. Thankfully, we are making great strides towards recovery, but unfortunately, my friend who recently died of Coronavirus had come down with the virus. She was my best friend, the person we used to hang out with when our house burned down and we were forced to live in temporary accommodations. Sadly, even though she was doing amazingly well and did fine for a little while, she got sick. At first, nobody wanted to share her room with anyone else, but I insisted on inviting her into my room. Her mom was a bit upset, but I explained to her that this was the very last chance she would get with most of her belongings. Unfortunately, she succumbed to Coronavirus. From that day onwards, she became unnoticeable from my perspective.

It hurts to imagine what would have happened if she would stay alive. What would I have done for her when she needed me the most? How would we have coped without having to face each other in public?

All these thoughts raced through my head while I was looking at photos that I liked at various locations, wondering who would have stayed there. Would it have been easier to have taken care of her if she had survived COVID-19, than stay home and suffer silently alone? Would she have remained in bed or has she managed to recover and become healthy? Did she manage it without becoming the victim of racism? These types of questions bothered me all the time, especially when I started imagining how I would have treated her if she had not gotten sick.

It wasn’t only the pain and anguish that I felt. I was genuinely worried that I would lose my best friend, whom I loved dearly. On top of the physical abuse, she suffered from the rest of humanity. Would I still be the same? Would I have gone through the pain and suffering to save my roommate? The fear that crept deep inside me was overwhelming.

I have been struggling with some mental health issues lately. I feel like I am back. I mean, sure there are moments when I can’t seem to relax or sleep properly. Most of the time, I can’t be happy. Perhaps it is my stress, but I can’t stop feeling gloomy and depressed sometimes. It doesn’t seem to matter how sad or hopeless I feel. Sometimes, I cannot figure out how to think positively anymore. Sometimes I think about killing myself, just to prove everyone wrong again. No, I couldn’t think that way. I just hate it. I love my mother enough to be the reason behind my happiness and sorrow. However, in the long run, I know I would be miserable without my best friend. I hope that everyone can meet the ones that they care about, regardless of circumstances. That person is always there for you. There is never a reason to cry or get angry. Your joy and sorrow should remain intact for you to be emotionally strong. If one tries to hold on to sadness forever, then that is how it will stay. So, it is important to have friends, loved ones, and dear ones that support you when you have low moments. Having such close ones to talk to and listen to you would make you stronger.

So, in conclusion, here we are, trying to navigate the rough waters of life. Doomsday can happen anywhere anytime and people with mental illnesses could die. Every second counts and if we manage to survive the current crisis, don’t lose faith in humanity. Think about the people you love, because they are watching over you and they know you better than anyone. May God bless us with strength during the darkest times, and may His blessings continue to help us overcome this challenging time. May you be blessed and protected even in the toughest times. Love and light, dear Diary.

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